I have often, in excusing my demeanor or actions, described myself as a 6 year-old boy who got thrown into this world which is way bigger than me and concerned with things I don't grasp. Kids try, but at a certain point there's a disconnect. At my core, there is a disconnect. I am a boy on the living room floor in his fireman hat with a toy fire engine. I am a boy with a Fisher-Price bubble-blowing lawn mower. I am a kid obsessed with the novelty of the bicycle without training wheels. I am into sweets and whole dill pickles...jar after jar of them. I am intrigued by the physics of hoisting my own body up a 15 foot pole to the top of my swing set. I can be seen at times in my back yard as the honorable knight Sir Enoch of Nochsenburg wrapped neck-to-toe in aluminum foil, gleaming in the morning light. I've missed some fashion cues and am the only 6 year-old on the block who can be found wearing hot pink hat, shirt, and shorts...BECAUSE I LIKE PINK. I've also been known to don a three-piece suit all day around the house for to particular reason, but I woke up and felt like it. My childish curiosity has compelled me on many occasions to dress up as a woman, complete with heels, a wig, and a fancy ladies hat, just to see what I might be missing as a boy.
I've been in some very adult situations. Strains of all kinds of stretched and contorted me in every way imaginable. In those moments it's difficult to feel in touch with the zen child within yourself. You feel very much in touch and connected to the weight of the world, and the dark matter of the universe which drags you closer and closer to a the final halt--one moment, after another moment, after another earth-shattering moment.
Kids don't understand those kinds of moments, and therefore they are not within their universe. Don't believe me? Spend a few moments with a child-in-body, connecting with their eyeballs and living with them. They'll let you into their universe for a moment or two. Pop your head in and you'll lack to apparatus to perceive the shit-storm you so frequently imagined.
This is not a lament for days gone by. You and I are still 6 year-old kids in a world which is way bigger than us and concerned with things we don't grasp. We sometimes try, but at a certain point there's a disconnect. At our core, there is a disconnect. Thank God. There are better things to dwell on.
ASK YOUR MOM IF YOU CAN COME OVER AND PLAY WITH ME
